Dilemma is not knowing whether to acknowledge the majesty of having known it, or to lament over a loss so dear to the soul. Ignorance is bliss, and oblivion feels safe, yet there is a beauty so profoundly unmatched, almost thrilling, in risking it; even though you give it your all, so completely aware of all that is at stake, at times your entire being and everything you have ever known.
Yet when the rest of mortality rests in peace, having lived embracing the comfort of that familiar couch known too well, relishing its warmth, surrendering to the oblivion of everything that could have been and the sheer illusion of everything that has been, a sphere of the mundane, hollow to the very core. What redeems it, then, is a moment. Just a moment, too magnanimous for any expression or comprehension, yet so subtle that when it touches one, everything shifts. Nothing is the same anymore.
It is in that moment, beyond any of the wildest dreams ever fathomed, that you cease to be, and so does everything else, only to become part of an absolute: a union of the purest kind. A surging of sweet pain that has you in tears, for everything is suddenly anew.
The twilight followed by a magnificent sunrise, radiating hues of blue and red and orange, a spectrum of perfection illuminating the infinite horizons and everything that is you. The world looks beautiful, imbued with meaning, afresh in the moments that follow, and sheer gratitude flows from your very soul, for it had fused with one alike, as you relish the newly discovered Eden.
And it is for that moment that one awaits an eternity. You could almost rejoice in everything that has passed, not for a result gone in vain, but for having set out into the unknown; a breakthrough from the clenching claws of fear, a demon that imprisons minds and blinds everything essential. Reinstating, discovering, living to the utmost everything that you are, everything that you ever dream to be, embracing the sublime satisfaction of choosing a road less travelled.
